Why

The past week or so I've been feeling out of place. Not that that's abnormal for me, but I've been feeling especially out of place lately. The more I realize that I'm getting older, I notice people of my age around me settling down. I'm wondering 'Is that what's next? Do I need to start looking for someone to settle down with?' To settle down sounds so final. Like dooms day is near the apocoplypse is inevitable. Nonetheless, I start to look at the men I've "talked" to in the past and realized they've all started to settle down as well. These are the same guys that were a-holes to me, wanted to just hit it and run, or wanted me but didn't want to commit or anything. They were still playing the field of sorts. But I didn't care at the time because I had just came out of a 4 year relationship and was heart broken so I was in no place to want anything from any guy.

Upon moving to Miami, I had no thought of wanting to meet someone and get into a relationship. That was until I met someone....and got into a relationship. Go figure! We were together for 2 years. In some respect, a waist but of course I learned alot. Don't get me wrong, I like him alot, and he was the only true friend I had who rescued me several times from the grips of druggies and such (I never did drugs but they were trying to get me into them). But, we definitely didn't mesh. We got together sort of on a whim. Of course at the time we thought it was a good idea, but one of us (of course him) wasn't really ready for a relationship. Come to find out 2 years later he's a serial dater. Meaning, he's constantly in a relationship. Someone who just can't seem to be single. These are things you should find out BEFORE jumping into a relationship with someone. But what did I know? I only had 1 prior experience so I didn't have much to go on.

Now I have a new opportunity. Well...sort of. I met this guy, who is great. Or at least I thought. That was until he sent me an email stating he has 2 loves. When I read this email I felt like deja vu all over again. It was, because my last ex had done the same thing. Supposedly, he fell in love with someone else and was in love with me. I get it. I guess I'm so easy going and laid back that guys can easily love me AND love someone else. I don't know. Whatever the thing is, I just don't get it. I guess I should start from the beginning in how this "love" thing happened with the new guy.

We met one night at a private club. At the time we were both in relationships. Me with my recent ex and him with his recent ex. We met briefly and that was it. No real conversation or anything. Thought that would've been the last of him. To be continued....