I traveled to Atlanta for a week to see my good friend Yve. She's a single mother of 3 (all under the age of 12!). She's come a long way since I first met her 3 years ago. I'm so proud of her. Since moving to Miami 2 1/2 yrs ago, I haven't been able to talk to her much. Now that I am here in her new home she purchased a few months ago, it feels good to see my TRUE friend again.
Friday night was my first night here and the weather was pretty nice. We already had plans to go out to a club called The Velvet Room. We had a great time. But I realized, if I ever wanted to move to Atlanta that I better have a man already or not want to ever be in a relationship. I was already warned about the men before I came here and experienced it first hand. The men are either a) flambouyantly gay, b) DL gay, or c) players because the other two types leave all the single women with no other choice. Which means, there are more women to go around for those who aren't a or b.Otherwise, I had a great time at the club with my friend. We danced our asses off and didn't worry about the men that were there.
I like Atlanta. Actually, I had a desire to really move here until my visit. I don't think Georgia is for me. This place is more suited for those with children and a spouse. A single person can't really survive in such a slow pace way of life. I appreciate Miami more now than before. I was really growing tired of Miami because of the dating scene and the constant partying. But now that I see what I could possibly be giving it up for, I have changed my mind.
I will be happy and stay in Miami.
Monday, December 22, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Life with a new Roommate
Like I told you before, I moved again. This time its the final move for at least a year. Until I decide if I want to stay in south Florida or move to another state. In the meanwhile, I will be getting my life together. Seriously! No guys, no friends with drama, no issues at work. Nothing! Nada!
Anyway, when I met my roommate I was excited because 1) I don't know her, 2) she was tired of moving around as well. At least that gauranteed that she wouldn't be picking up and moving anytime soon just because of some guy asking her to move in with him. Or is it??! Well, I will deal with that as it comes. Having a stranger as a roommate is a sure thing that you won't have to worry about them taking advantage of you just because they know you. I've seen many friendships ruined by people who were friends in the beginning and decided to become roommates. I also know from personal experience. I figured this was the perfect situation.
The other day, my roommate cooked herself a little spaghetti dinner with meat sauce. No big deal. I saw the pot was on the stove with food still in it but I figured since it was fresh that she would be coming back down for seconds, so I never said anything. Lucky for me, I came back downstairs a few hours later and the food was still on the stove uncovered. I saw where this was going, but again I didn't say anything. Now, keep in mind that a few weeks earlier I already explained to her that to be mindful of each other we shouldn't leave food or dishes in the sink for reason of bugs and bad odor. She agreed to keeping this up. And to now see that she is not minding our agreement is very frustrating to me. Again, I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be a "nag" but I felt I was going to have to point it out to her. The next morning I get up to go to work and YES you guessed right, the food was still on the stove in the uncovered pot. Also, there was food splattered on the stove top and a pile of nasty dishes in the sink. Yes, my blood was boiling. But I didn't have time to deal with this because I was already late to work. I decided on my lunch break to go home and see if she cleaned any of her crap. When I got there, I was disgusted! The smell, the bugs that were accumulating. It was just nasty! Now I'm pissed. And rightfully so. I have to live here too. I wasn't asking her the world. I just wanted her to get the food off of the stove and clean it with the clorox wipes that I provided for her to use. Simple and easy. Not hard. So when I text her (because that's her only means of contact) I asked her nicely to clean her dishes when she gets home. Here's how the text conversation went:
Me: When you get home today please wash your dishes. I put your leftover spaghetti in a zip loc in the fridge because I saw some little bugs flying around.
Roommate: I was planning on it. Thank you for putting it away.
Roommate: Your like a dish nazi! You had your from yesterday too girl!
Roommate: Come on now.
Me: I came home and cleaned up for lunch.
Roommate: I will wash my dishes and clean my stuff. You don't need to remind me. That's why I left my house.
Roommate: :)
Roommate: Yeah well u had it there for a few days so.
Roommate: Who cares you know.
Roommate: Let's just split the sink and worry about our own stuff
Me: That's cool.
Roommate: I don't want to come across as rude but I don't like to feel like I'm being told what to do.
Roommate: Like especially since its been like two weeks since we've been there and we are still settleing in.
Me: Ok. That's cool.
Me: I understand.
Roommate: Seems overwhelming I know. Ill clean that boxes today too! They are bothering me!
Me: I already took care of it.
Roommate: You didn't have to!
Rommate: Thank you.
Me: No problem
Now if you're a friend of mine or know me at all, you'd know by my last few short responses to her were that of anger being kept at bay. This child is crazy. She called me a dish nazi! WTF!?! Oh excuse me for not wanting bugs in the kitchen and disliking the smell of rotten cooked meat in my house! I'm so sorry. I just don't understand people. That' why I don't have many friends because they just don't make sense to me. Oh well, what can I do. I have at least a year with her. I'm very happy with staying in my room and minding my business the whole time because I have a goal. And nothing is going to keep me from acomplishing it. Not even a pestering child of a roommate who likes to live in filth.
Anyway, when I met my roommate I was excited because 1) I don't know her, 2) she was tired of moving around as well. At least that gauranteed that she wouldn't be picking up and moving anytime soon just because of some guy asking her to move in with him. Or is it??! Well, I will deal with that as it comes. Having a stranger as a roommate is a sure thing that you won't have to worry about them taking advantage of you just because they know you. I've seen many friendships ruined by people who were friends in the beginning and decided to become roommates. I also know from personal experience. I figured this was the perfect situation.
The other day, my roommate cooked herself a little spaghetti dinner with meat sauce. No big deal. I saw the pot was on the stove with food still in it but I figured since it was fresh that she would be coming back down for seconds, so I never said anything. Lucky for me, I came back downstairs a few hours later and the food was still on the stove uncovered. I saw where this was going, but again I didn't say anything. Now, keep in mind that a few weeks earlier I already explained to her that to be mindful of each other we shouldn't leave food or dishes in the sink for reason of bugs and bad odor. She agreed to keeping this up. And to now see that she is not minding our agreement is very frustrating to me. Again, I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be a "nag" but I felt I was going to have to point it out to her. The next morning I get up to go to work and YES you guessed right, the food was still on the stove in the uncovered pot. Also, there was food splattered on the stove top and a pile of nasty dishes in the sink. Yes, my blood was boiling. But I didn't have time to deal with this because I was already late to work. I decided on my lunch break to go home and see if she cleaned any of her crap. When I got there, I was disgusted! The smell, the bugs that were accumulating. It was just nasty! Now I'm pissed. And rightfully so. I have to live here too. I wasn't asking her the world. I just wanted her to get the food off of the stove and clean it with the clorox wipes that I provided for her to use. Simple and easy. Not hard. So when I text her (because that's her only means of contact) I asked her nicely to clean her dishes when she gets home. Here's how the text conversation went:
Me: When you get home today please wash your dishes. I put your leftover spaghetti in a zip loc in the fridge because I saw some little bugs flying around.
Roommate: I was planning on it. Thank you for putting it away.
Roommate: Your like a dish nazi! You had your from yesterday too girl!
Roommate: Come on now.
Me: I came home and cleaned up for lunch.
Roommate: I will wash my dishes and clean my stuff. You don't need to remind me. That's why I left my house.
Roommate: :)
Roommate: Yeah well u had it there for a few days so.
Roommate: Who cares you know.
Roommate: Let's just split the sink and worry about our own stuff
Me: That's cool.
Roommate: I don't want to come across as rude but I don't like to feel like I'm being told what to do.
Roommate: Like especially since its been like two weeks since we've been there and we are still settleing in.
Me: Ok. That's cool.
Me: I understand.
Roommate: Seems overwhelming I know. Ill clean that boxes today too! They are bothering me!
Me: I already took care of it.
Roommate: You didn't have to!
Rommate: Thank you.
Me: No problem
Now if you're a friend of mine or know me at all, you'd know by my last few short responses to her were that of anger being kept at bay. This child is crazy. She called me a dish nazi! WTF!?! Oh excuse me for not wanting bugs in the kitchen and disliking the smell of rotten cooked meat in my house! I'm so sorry. I just don't understand people. That' why I don't have many friends because they just don't make sense to me. Oh well, what can I do. I have at least a year with her. I'm very happy with staying in my room and minding my business the whole time because I have a goal. And nothing is going to keep me from acomplishing it. Not even a pestering child of a roommate who likes to live in filth.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Scarey stuff
Alot has happened since I moved into the house with two other people. Things like... I MOVED AGAIN!! Yes, you heard right. I moved again. Why? Because of my queen of a roommate. Long story short, I found a townhouse and renting it for alot less than what I was paying this other guy. I really feel like this is the place I'm going to live in for a while. At least another two years which is what I've been aiming for. Moving is too tedious, time consuming, emotional, and expensive to do it 4 times in less than a year. Times like that is when you wish you had a man to help you because at least you can share all those things with him. Don't let me get started on that subject.
I now live in an old (probably 1950s) townhouse with Nicole. She is my coworkers best friend since they were little. I knew she was quirky but I didn't know how quirkie. Of course in the beginning we had to discuss all the "rules" of the house, but so far I'm not complaining. She likes to do everything I don't like to do such as decorate and buy girlie things to display around the house. I'm just not into that stuff. She has a dog by the name of Chili, who is actually kinda cool for the most part. He has gone into my room and he knows better but I'm not worried. He's a cool dog surprisingly. In all, I'm pretty happy with this decision. I'm really working hard at making it stick this time because God knows I need it to. But I have a feeling He is helping me work it out.
I like how my roommate and I met because I lived with strangers and I've lived with friends. Its bad to live with friends because they feel like they can do whatever they want with you since you are friends. At least with strangers, there is a shared trust issue, and you never have to worry about them not liking you because you never knew each other anyway to like and becomes friends with. You just have to share the bills and live in the same house. Many friendships have been ruined because they lived together and something happened to cause them not to be friends again.
Granted there are still some issues we are working out but they're minor. In all, I'm pretty happy right now. Now only if I could get some money I'd be set.
I now live in an old (probably 1950s) townhouse with Nicole. She is my coworkers best friend since they were little. I knew she was quirky but I didn't know how quirkie. Of course in the beginning we had to discuss all the "rules" of the house, but so far I'm not complaining. She likes to do everything I don't like to do such as decorate and buy girlie things to display around the house. I'm just not into that stuff. She has a dog by the name of Chili, who is actually kinda cool for the most part. He has gone into my room and he knows better but I'm not worried. He's a cool dog surprisingly. In all, I'm pretty happy with this decision. I'm really working hard at making it stick this time because God knows I need it to. But I have a feeling He is helping me work it out.
I like how my roommate and I met because I lived with strangers and I've lived with friends. Its bad to live with friends because they feel like they can do whatever they want with you since you are friends. At least with strangers, there is a shared trust issue, and you never have to worry about them not liking you because you never knew each other anyway to like and becomes friends with. You just have to share the bills and live in the same house. Many friendships have been ruined because they lived together and something happened to cause them not to be friends again.
Granted there are still some issues we are working out but they're minor. In all, I'm pretty happy right now. Now only if I could get some money I'd be set.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
My lovely new Home....lol
Well it's almost 3 weeks since I moved into my new place. I share a house with 2 other people. A 40 year old gay guy and a 20 something college student. The girl is never around so she never bothers me, but the guy....OMG!! Unfortunately, he's home all of the time but supposedly he's getting a job for next month. He's like a dorm mother in that he wants me announce to him any time my friends are coming and I can't touch the a/c which is always set on 68 degrees! My gawd! I don't know if I will last a whole year here but we will see. Maybe it's actually a good thing. It might get me out of the house more often. Oh, and did I mention he has a whole lot of shyt!! Man does he have alot of shyt. For someone who claimed to be a newly found minimalist due to losing everything in New Orleans during Katrina, he sure has alot of shyt! In addition, he's a true pothead. I mean don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong smoking here and there recreationally. But he does it ALL day and EVERY day. I mean come on, that's just crazy! And I think that's what causes his parnoia. I always wonder about people and why they are the way they are, but does it really matter? Maybe....maybe not. But once I find out what good does it do me? Probably nothing. Oh well. Moving on. I'm going to take a nap now. After working two 10 hour days straight and two more to go, I'm exhausted.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
My work wardrobe rejected?!?
Fairly recently a new trend came about which are the walking shorts a.k.a. Bermuda shorts. They have been presented suitable for work when worn with an appropriate shirt and shoes. At first I wasn't too impressed with the shorts, but I soon came around. One day I made myself try on a pair and realized I actually liked them. So I took a gamble and bought two pair from express ($10 each). Both tailored and looked presentable for work. Usually I'd wear them either with a button up shirt or a sweater with a light knit shirt underneath. Well, a new "decree" went out a few weeks ago at work about the dress code. Of course mainly for the women because menswear is so simple that there is no way they could be under dressed for work. I realized that one of the items were shorts. I figured what was meat were shorts that were outreageously short and tight. As you can see, the shorts I had were tailored, knee length, and of a decent fit. Will you believe I was told I could NOT wear these to work anymore by HR?! I was shocked to say the least. But when I asked why you couldn't believe the answer I got. I'm pretty cool with the HR lady so she proceeded to tell me that it wasn't because of how unprofessional they looked on me or anything. Its just that there are some people of larger girth (a.k.a. fat) who wear the same thing and it doesn't look very appropriate. Since they were told they couldn't wear them then I can't wear them. Now I was pretty pissed off by this because I shouldn't be punished just because of someone else's inability to decipher what's appropriate for them to wear to work.
Ladies, just because you see something is in style doesn't mean you can wear it. Please wear things that are appropriate for your body. That goes for women of all sizes. I may be thin but doesn't mean I can wear everything! You would never see me wearing skin tight pants and a cropped top or halter. I'm getting a little too old for the teenie bopper look. So you get my point? Wear what appropriate for your body please! Also, wear your size!! That's another peeve of mine. A size is just a freakin' number! Get over yourself, if you wear a double digit size....so what! Stop trying to fit into clothes that don't fit. That's enough for now. I'll get on my soap box later that complain about some other things. Lata...
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Why
The past week or so I've been feeling out of place. Not that that's abnormal for me, but I've been feeling especially out of place lately. The more I realize that I'm getting older, I notice people of my age around me settling down. I'm wondering 'Is that what's next? Do I need to start looking for someone to settle down with?' To settle down sounds so final. Like dooms day is near the apocoplypse is inevitable. Nonetheless, I start to look at the men I've "talked" to in the past and realized they've all started to settle down as well. These are the same guys that were a-holes to me, wanted to just hit it and run, or wanted me but didn't want to commit or anything. They were still playing the field of sorts. But I didn't care at the time because I had just came out of a 4 year relationship and was heart broken so I was in no place to want anything from any guy.
Upon moving to Miami, I had no thought of wanting to meet someone and get into a relationship. That was until I met someone....and got into a relationship. Go figure! We were together for 2 years. In some respect, a waist but of course I learned alot. Don't get me wrong, I like him alot, and he was the only true friend I had who rescued me several times from the grips of druggies and such (I never did drugs but they were trying to get me into them). But, we definitely didn't mesh. We got together sort of on a whim. Of course at the time we thought it was a good idea, but one of us (of course him) wasn't really ready for a relationship. Come to find out 2 years later he's a serial dater. Meaning, he's constantly in a relationship. Someone who just can't seem to be single. These are things you should find out BEFORE jumping into a relationship with someone. But what did I know? I only had 1 prior experience so I didn't have much to go on.
Now I have a new opportunity. Well...sort of. I met this guy, who is great. Or at least I thought. That was until he sent me an email stating he has 2 loves. When I read this email I felt like deja vu all over again. It was, because my last ex had done the same thing. Supposedly, he fell in love with someone else and was in love with me. I get it. I guess I'm so easy going and laid back that guys can easily love me AND love someone else. I don't know. Whatever the thing is, I just don't get it. I guess I should start from the beginning in how this "love" thing happened with the new guy.
We met one night at a private club. At the time we were both in relationships. Me with my recent ex and him with his recent ex. We met briefly and that was it. No real conversation or anything. Thought that would've been the last of him. To be continued....
Upon moving to Miami, I had no thought of wanting to meet someone and get into a relationship. That was until I met someone....and got into a relationship. Go figure! We were together for 2 years. In some respect, a waist but of course I learned alot. Don't get me wrong, I like him alot, and he was the only true friend I had who rescued me several times from the grips of druggies and such (I never did drugs but they were trying to get me into them). But, we definitely didn't mesh. We got together sort of on a whim. Of course at the time we thought it was a good idea, but one of us (of course him) wasn't really ready for a relationship. Come to find out 2 years later he's a serial dater. Meaning, he's constantly in a relationship. Someone who just can't seem to be single. These are things you should find out BEFORE jumping into a relationship with someone. But what did I know? I only had 1 prior experience so I didn't have much to go on.
Now I have a new opportunity. Well...sort of. I met this guy, who is great. Or at least I thought. That was until he sent me an email stating he has 2 loves. When I read this email I felt like deja vu all over again. It was, because my last ex had done the same thing. Supposedly, he fell in love with someone else and was in love with me. I get it. I guess I'm so easy going and laid back that guys can easily love me AND love someone else. I don't know. Whatever the thing is, I just don't get it. I guess I should start from the beginning in how this "love" thing happened with the new guy.
We met one night at a private club. At the time we were both in relationships. Me with my recent ex and him with his recent ex. We met briefly and that was it. No real conversation or anything. Thought that would've been the last of him. To be continued....
Sunday, August 3, 2008
First Blog
Well, I got this wonderful idea from a friend of mine I'm staying with right now. I figured since I tend to have so much inside of me and don't know anyone that will just listen, I might as well spill my guts to whomever cares to read my ramblings.
Let me begin by introducing myself. My name is Shena (pronounced shay-nuh) and I'm 26 years old living in south Florida. I'm originally from Maryland, but anyone from that area knows that most of us consider ourselves to be from D.C. I grew up there for 24 years before I decided to up and leave my life in MD/DC for a new and uncertain life in Miami.
I had a pretty normal childhood. That was until my mother was diagnosed with Leukemia in 1990 and died December 17, 1992. I was 10 years old and her only daughter of 3 children. She was also the only daughter of my maternal grandmother of 5 children. My family was torn apart by this tragedy but still had to live on. To be honest, I don't know how any of us made it without killing ourselves or each other. That story is better left for another blog.
I went to private catholic school throught grade school and to add insult, I went to private all girl high school. Of course, like any normal teen, I thought I was going to die when my father told me I had to go to this school. But, now that I'm older and see the world for what it is, I am actually thankful for my dad's decision. Even though, it was really his intent on doing whatever he could to keep off of the pole, lol. Going to an all-girl school has made me a more confident woman and adult. I was never confident before and believe if I went to a co-ed school, I would not be the daring and strong person I am today. Then again, I probably get it form my mother anyway. Who knows.
As my high school career was ending I met and fell in love with my first love and "fiancee" Moh. I put fiancee in quotes because I was only 17 at the time and he was my first actual boyfriend ever. And, I'm actually laughing hysterically as I write this, lost my virginity to! Its funny because I know alot of girls who said the same old line "I'm saving it for my husband. The only man I'll love and be with forever." Bull shit! Not to say I didn't love Moh, but let's just say I'm not with the guy and we never got married.
Obviously, the story doesn't end there. But, I am tired and must get ready for another work week with my wonderful co-workers (send the sarcasm). I will blog again tomorrow. I think this the start of a beautiful beginning.
Let me begin by introducing myself. My name is Shena (pronounced shay-nuh) and I'm 26 years old living in south Florida. I'm originally from Maryland, but anyone from that area knows that most of us consider ourselves to be from D.C. I grew up there for 24 years before I decided to up and leave my life in MD/DC for a new and uncertain life in Miami.
I had a pretty normal childhood. That was until my mother was diagnosed with Leukemia in 1990 and died December 17, 1992. I was 10 years old and her only daughter of 3 children. She was also the only daughter of my maternal grandmother of 5 children. My family was torn apart by this tragedy but still had to live on. To be honest, I don't know how any of us made it without killing ourselves or each other. That story is better left for another blog.
I went to private catholic school throught grade school and to add insult, I went to private all girl high school. Of course, like any normal teen, I thought I was going to die when my father told me I had to go to this school. But, now that I'm older and see the world for what it is, I am actually thankful for my dad's decision. Even though, it was really his intent on doing whatever he could to keep off of the pole, lol. Going to an all-girl school has made me a more confident woman and adult. I was never confident before and believe if I went to a co-ed school, I would not be the daring and strong person I am today. Then again, I probably get it form my mother anyway. Who knows.
As my high school career was ending I met and fell in love with my first love and "fiancee" Moh. I put fiancee in quotes because I was only 17 at the time and he was my first actual boyfriend ever. And, I'm actually laughing hysterically as I write this, lost my virginity to! Its funny because I know alot of girls who said the same old line "I'm saving it for my husband. The only man I'll love and be with forever." Bull shit! Not to say I didn't love Moh, but let's just say I'm not with the guy and we never got married.
Obviously, the story doesn't end there. But, I am tired and must get ready for another work week with my wonderful co-workers (send the sarcasm). I will blog again tomorrow. I think this the start of a beautiful beginning.
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